I was bad and needed to be punished

Bondage punishment, being spanked paddled and caned before and during sex

Took a long time before I realized what I really wanted and it came to sex. One time when I was young and having sex my boyfriend spanked my butt a couple times. I wanted him to do it more but I was afraid to say so. I never told my future partners either nor did I tell them I really wanted to be tied up and punished and teased. I wanted to feel the helplessness and the power of someone else having control over my body. Someone that I trusted. Somehow I found that person and I told him I got all I wanted him to do to me and He was all for it. Yet from like 6 months and told me I had to wait. This intensified my desire and wants. I began to fantasize daily. One day he told me I was absolutely not allowed to open up any packages that came in his name. My imagination ran with it, hoping he was buying bondage gear, ball gags, blindfolds and items to punish me with. I began masturbating with these thoughts every time he was out of town. He had taken away all of my vibrators and sex toys that I loved so I had to go only with my imagination and I thought it was going to be really difficult to get myself off without these items But it wasn't. I thought of him trying me down with my ass in the air. He'd start off spanking me on my ass with his hands. He'd start off lightly and and then spank me harder and harder. I told him I did not want to safe word because I knew he would not take me beyond what I could endure. Then he would leave me tied with gag blindfolded etc and would tell me that he would return in a few minutes. But he didn't. He was gone for at least an hour and my body and my mind were driving me insane the whole time. When he watching the room and touched me it felt like an electric shock. I could then hear him slapping the belt against his hand. And then it started slapping my ass. And it started out lately and it became harder and harder and the stings were more and more painful, The pain was so much more intense. Almost to the point where I wanted to scream out and tell him to stop stop stop but I couldn't because there's some reason I didn't want to. He left the room again and told me he'd be back in a few minutes. He did the same thing to me and made me wait and wait and wait. When he came back in the room I could hear him smacking the king against his hand and this is when I became really fearful but electrified with desire. Before he began punishing me with the cane, he ran his fingers between my legs up and down my pussy. Softly, teasing me, a little pressure on my clit in round little circles, Then again, his fingers up and down my pussy slowly, teasingly, driving me insane. I wanted it to go on forever but abruptly he pulled his hand away. Omg the intensity of desire was immense. Then he started tapping my ass and my thighs with the cane. I knew it was going to be painful I knew it was going to be worse than everything else I had felt and I tried it repair myself but it was impossible. It was intense. He started out slowly lightly tapping a few times and stopping. Tapping on the other cheek, and stopping. Drawing the cane across my ass and gently over my clit and pussy. I want to scream but the ball gag prevented me from doing that. The strikes of the cane became harder and faster. Mostly on my ass but some on my thighs and some of my back. I pulled on the vines with my arms and my legs, I tried to squirm to get away but due to the bondage holding me down there was nothing I could do But endure. I had told him what I had wanted for so many years And it was all beginning to be fulfilled. The blows with the cane began to slow down and become lighter and eventually came to a stop. My ass was on fire, I didn't think I ever would be able to sit down again. He stoked my pussy, he rubbed my clit, very gently and only a few times. If you can call it bucking, If it's possible to do that when you're firmly tied down by all fours, that is what I was doing. That's when he untied me. And that's when he also told me he would see me again the next night. He told me that I wasn't allowed to bring myself to orgasm, I wasn't allowed to masturbate. He told me he would know if I did and we would not have a session the next day. This was the last thing I expected from him. I pleaded and I begged but but he merely pushed me roughly back down on the bed, and he held my arms down and told me I had to obey because he was in charge of my body now. I hated it and I loved it. And then he turned and walked out the door.